Screens, Play, and Parenting

resilience Apr 22, 2025

What I’ve Learned About Screens, Play, and Parenting the Third Time Around.

When my older boys were toddlers — now 10 and 13 — we were the first wave of iPad parents.

We didn’t really stop to think about what screens were doing to them.
It felt new, exciting, and to be honest, sometimes… necessary.
Dinner needed cooking. I needed a break. Everyone else was doing it.

So we handed over the screen.
One Ryan’s Toy Review after another.
Kinder egg unboxings. Hours of YouTube. Endless swiping.
And the toys? They stayed in their boxes.

💔 Looking Back

It didn’t happen all at once — but over time, I watched my children’s capacity for imaginative play shrink.
Their ability to sit in boredom or create their own fun faded.

And I had all the excuses under my wing — I truly did.
But looking back now, I see it clearly:

My boys were addicted to screens. And it happened before my eyes.

It wasn’t intentional. It wasn’t bad parenting. It was uninformed parenting in a brand-new digital world we were all still learning how to navigate.

Thank goodness, as they grew older, they found their way back to the real world — through martial arts, sport, physical movement, and passion.
But I’ll be honest… it took time.

🌱 A Different Approach With My Youngest

Now, I have a three-year-old.
And while the world hasn’t changed dramatically — I have.

Yes, he still watches TV. And yes, some of it is total rubbish.
But our bedtime routine? It’s different. It’s powerful. It’s intentional.

After his bath, we go into his room and:

Play for an hour — real, tactile, open-ended play
Draw and create together
Read stories slowly, with space for wonder
Connect without background noise

And it’s calming. Grounding. Soulful.
I see it in his development. In his confidence. In his emotional language.
He's not rushed — and neither am I.

🧠 Why This Matters: Screens vs. Connection

This isn’t about guilt.
It’s about reflection. And choice.

Here’s what I’ve come to believe:

Screens are not the enemy. Disconnection is.
And it’s the little things that reconnect us:

Real play
Slowing down
Making space for boredom
Creating rituals that build trust and calm

I don’t beat myself up for what I didn’t know back then.
But I do lean into what I’ve learned.

🧒 What’s Different This Time

It’s not just the bedtime routine.
It’s that I see the value of:

Unstructured play over passive watching
Connection before correction
Being present more than being perfect

Each of my children is different. But I can see now how different approaches to play, attention, and routine shape their emotional development.
And I feel more empowered than I ever have before.

💛 Final Thought

If you're parenting in the age of screens, know this:

It’s not too late. You’re not behind.
Whether your child is three or thirteen, you can always shift the energy.

Maybe it’s one less video.
Maybe it’s five minutes of drawing together before bed.
Maybe it’s noticing when play becomes real again.

Those moments matter.
And they multiply.

So here’s to growing. Evolving. And raising connected kids — one calm bedtime at a time.