The Power of Shared Passions: How Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Deepened My Bond with My Son

The Power of Shared Passions: How Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Deepened My Bond with My Son
Why Practising a Hobby or Martial Art Together Builds More Than Just Skills

There’s something powerful about doing hard things alongside the people you love.

Three years ago, I stepped onto the mat not just for fitness or self-defence, but for connection. My eldest son had started Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and I saw a chance to do something that wasn’t just for him, but with him.

As a parent, it can be hard to find shared ground as our kids grow older. Life gets busy, and the little moments of connection can get lost in the shuffle of school runs, work emails, and dinner prep. But what I discovered on the mats was a kind of magic—a playful, sweaty, laughter-filled magic that strengthened our bond in ways I never imagined.

Why Shared Hobbies with Your Child Matter

When we engage in a shared hobby or sport with our children—whether it’s martial arts, hiking, painting, or even board games—we create a space that’s equal parts connection, challenge, and fun. These moments become anchors. They create a rhythm of “us time” that deepens relationships far beyond surface-level chats.

And Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu? It’s the full package.

The Science Behind the Connection

BJJ isn’t just great for the body—it’s a neurochemical playground. Here’s why:

• Dopamine: Learning a new skill or mastering a technique fires up the brain’s reward system. Every time my son and I learn something new together, there’s a shared sense of achievement that boosts our confidence and our bond.

• Oxytocin: Known as the “cuddle hormone,” this powerful connector is released through touch. In Jiu-Jitsu, there’s a whole lot of it—think of it as grappling meets bonding.

• Endorphins: Those post-training highs? That’s endorphins doing their thing—fighting stress, boosting happiness, and making it easier to laugh even after a tough roll.

• Serotonin: The mindfulness and focus BJJ requires naturally regulates our mood and helps with emotional balance. For kids (and let’s be honest—for us parents too), this is gold.

When all of these happy hormones fire together, it’s no wonder Jiu-Jitsu becomes more than just a sport—it becomes therapy, connection, and joy, all rolled into one.

More Than Just Training—It's Time Well Spent

Some of our best laughs come from silly warm-ups or failed takedowns. And some of our most treasured memories come from shared victories, like when one of us finally nails a tricky submission or earns a stripe.

There’s something incredibly bonding about sweating, struggling, learning, and growing side by side. It turns time together into meaningful time.

The Takeaway: Train Together, Grow Together

Whether it’s Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu or another shared pursuit, doing something with your child—not just cheering from the sidelines—builds trust, connection, and lifelong memories. And for us, BJJ became the bridge.

If you’ve ever thought about picking up a hobby you can share with your child, consider this your sign. The benefits go far beyond the physical—and the rewards are worth every awkward first class.

p.s. This picture is my